5 Funny Things The Bible Never Said

Last Updated on December 30, 2021 by Pastor Ikechukwu Chinedum

It is funny how we have recreated the Bible. When we get a message from the Bible, we don’t press deeper to get the meaning or what it could be telling us. What we do is create an image for it and from there we begin to promote the things that the scripture never said. It will interest you to know that there are so many things we quote out of the scripture that is not in the Bible.

While we may not know the origin of some of these wrong quotes, we will highlight them so we all can make corrections. We have compiled a list of 5 funny things the Bible never said.

5 funny things the Bible never said

Eve ate the apple after she was deceived by the serpent

Genesis 3:6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.

It is funny how we have misconstrued the concept of fruit for apples. The scripture only described what Eve ate as fruit. And fruit is a compound word for anything that grows on the tree. It could be mango, pear, or anything. The Bible was specific about the kind of fruit it is.

Funnily this misconception has made Apple get cheap popularity. Men would not even want to take this fruit from people after they learned of the nefarious activity it was used to carry out by the serpent. May I clear your doubt? it was not specifically an Apple, the scripture said Fruit. It could be any type of fruit.

The three wise men from the East

Mathew 2:1-12 Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we have seen His star in the East and have come to worship Him.” When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him. And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born. So they said to him, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for thus it is written by the prophet: ‘But you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, Are not the least among the rulers of Judah; For out of you shall come a Ruler Who will shepherd My people Israel.’ ”Then Herod, when he had secretly called the wise men, determined from them what time the star appeared. And he sent them to Bethlehem and said, “Go and search carefully for the young Child, and when you have found Him, bring back word to me, that I may come and worship Him also.” When they heard the king, they departed; and behold, the star which they had seen in the East went before them, till it came and stood over where the young Child was. When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceedingly great joy. And when they had come into the house, they saw the young Child with Mary His mother, and fell down and worshiped Him. And when they had opened their treasures, they presented gifts to Him: gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

The wise men came bearing gifts for the newborn Jesus. The Bible only recorder that they brought three gifts with them. No portion of the scripture revealed that there were three of them that came. However, we concluded there were three of them since they brought three gifts.

Jonah wasn’t swallowed by a whale

Jonah 1:17 Now the LORD had prepared a great fish to swallow Jonah. And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

This is one of the most common things we say that is not in the scripture. There is no translation of the scripture that described the fish that swallowed Jonah as a whale. The scripture only explained that God prepared a big fish. A big fish could be any type of fish. But because we know that whales are the biggest type of fish in the ocean, we draw our conclusion that the fish was a whale.

The Bible was not specific about the type of fish it was.

Money is not the root of evil

 1 Timothy 6:10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

It is funny to know that many believers have given up their quest to make a good living because of the popular parlance that money is the root of all evil. Because of this, many believers have continued to live in poverty.

The scripture never said money in its natural state is the root of evil. What the Bible said was that the love of money in the heart of men is the root of all evil. Christ admonishes that we should love our neighbors as ourselves. That is what we should love.

Unfortunately, many people see money as evil today and they have continued to live in poverty due to this mentality.

God won’t give you trial beyond you can handle

1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

This portion of the scripture has been largely misinterpreted. Our interpretation of it makes it look as though we have the power of our own to manage our situation without the help of God. If that was the case, there was no need for Christ coming to die for man. There was no need for God to send the Holy Spirit to help our infirmities.

Man in his natural state is weak and vulnerable. Help and strength come the moment the Holy Spirit has come upon us. This further explains why we constantly need Jesus in all our endeavors.